感觉，缘分还是明明中已经注定?
你在我的三月里出现,在我最无助,失落的时候,让我有了可以不用让自己过的那么累的理由.
一切发生的很突然，连我自己都有些不知所措.
原本只是偷偷的在一旁看着朋友们评论着陌生的你,而我只是静静的在一旁听着,偶尔维护着你, 因为总觉得你不是他们所看见的。
直到fb messenger跑出了你的名字和照片. 当下的我，很惊讶可是又不能显得太兴奋。第一次和你聊天，感觉就像认识很久的朋友，聊不停.
谢谢你的关心，疼爱，陪伴.
当我以为我需要一个人度过的时候，不再一个人。
当我在被欺负的时候，替我打抱不平。
当我在无助不知所措的时候，把我拉开回家。
当我在想家的时候，给我暖暖的拥抱。
我的小幸运cwy
Saturday, April 9, 2016
Saturday, November 21, 2015
时间才是世界短跑冠军.
姐姐我想呐喊：你跑酱快做莫！！？？？
咻！ 十一月了！ 看回我前两个post，我还在慢慢回忆着“去年” 的十一月！！
啊， 进大学的第三个月。 骗很大啊！哪里有想象中的那么美好， 之前的憧憬和渴望想泡沫“波”一下就不见了
第一个月，充满着新鸟的活力，信心满满，正能量爆表!
第二个月，功课开始变得繁重，社团也忙碌了起来，可是还是乐在其中。和一些朋友开始变得熟络了。
第三个月，哇靠！ 难道这就是大学吗？！功课，group assignment, exam, activitiesssss, relationship, 都给我在这个时候出问题。很累很想逃离.睡眠越来越没有品质，功课也有些怠慢，处理人际关系也变得不是那么得心应手。每天都是排的满满满满满的meetings. 停止吧！ 快顶不住了
希望这是我在这里最辛苦的一个月，而不是个恶梦的开始。
咻！ 十一月了！ 看回我前两个post，我还在慢慢回忆着“去年” 的十一月！！
啊， 进大学的第三个月。 骗很大啊！哪里有想象中的那么美好， 之前的憧憬和渴望想泡沫“波”一下就不见了
第一个月，充满着新鸟的活力，信心满满，正能量爆表!
第二个月，功课开始变得繁重，社团也忙碌了起来，可是还是乐在其中。和一些朋友开始变得熟络了。
第三个月，哇靠！ 难道这就是大学吗？！功课，group assignment, exam, activitiesssss, relationship, 都给我在这个时候出问题。很累很想逃离.睡眠越来越没有品质，功课也有些怠慢，处理人际关系也变得不是那么得心应手。每天都是排的满满满满满的meetings. 停止吧！ 快顶不住了
希望这是我在这里最辛苦的一个月，而不是个恶梦的开始。
Wednesday, August 5, 2015
遗忘
谁有喜欢被遗忘的滋味呢？
当大家都忘了你，而你还在傻傻的回复他们的邀请.
尴尬的气氛，只有当事者知道
但不能怪谁，是出必有因.
存在感不明显，要别人怎样记得你呢？
这种事我早就习惯了．遗忘我的你，唉．．别尴尬嘛
当大家都忘了你，而你还在傻傻的回复他们的邀请.
尴尬的气氛，只有当事者知道
但不能怪谁，是出必有因.
存在感不明显，要别人怎样记得你呢？
这种事我早就习惯了．遗忘我的你，唉．．别尴尬嘛
Sunday, August 2, 2015
我不想，为谁而改变
匆忙的度过了毕业后的八个月.
十一月，刚考完试，憧憬&冲劲才刚刚萌芽。心里也对着未来的生活充满着无数的期待.一心的想要珍惜所有的一切.
十二月，甜蜜精彩的圣诞月. 看回之间在十二月写的一篇部落格才发现，十二月也发生很多让人伤心的事情. 但朋友和家人的陪伴，还算快乐的度过了
一月，新的一年，新的希望.大家开始工作，开始上课了.机器人的日子，才刚刚开始。也是打击了我，让我破茧而出的时候.我才慢慢的学习长大.
二月，有些平淡，但因为是农历新年的缘故，还过得挺不错的.回家乡和家人亲戚们一起度过,简单幸福.
三月，拿成绩单的日子.一年半的努力就只为了那几个数字吧. 成绩也不至于让我感到不快.还可以吧.满足就好，不强求了.毕竟考试不是一切。因为我不是学霸，所以我说得出这种话. 我愿意当个比较有才华的普通学生.哈哈哈 哪门子的自我安慰啊
四月，开始感受到工作上的不愉快，恨不得下一秒我就能潇洒不干. 有点榴莲特质的我，心里那软绵绵的我劝了自己，在忍一忍吧！
五月，开始了忙碌的社团活动，一年多没有接触的人和事，难免会生疏，虽然那些曾经是我多有信心和引以为傲的事情啊！有点小尴尬，毕竟同龄的伙伴们都已经找到了自己的定位.而我就得慢慢的摸索.庆幸选了自己所属的领域，重新开始。重新自定义.
六月,压力和体力超出负荷的月头.病了,偏偏在要去露营活动的时候.满伤心的,又再度的让别人否定了我的诚信.好不容易建立起的信心，又被击垮了.
好在，能赶在我唯一能做点事的夜晚前赶到现场去帮忙.应该还算负责任吧！我忘了自己那晚所跳的舞蹈好不好，有没有跳错，但我知道我的存在让我的同伴们多了份安全感，我知道在表演时他们还是会偷偷的瞄我的舞步．这样，足够了吧！ 尽管我知道以我的经验和能力,我保持太沉默了.哎哟，人家比较慢热. 在出席了“活动评估会议”（post mortem meeting) ，得到了一点点的赞扬，还有个dancing queen的封号.感觉不错,因为做着自己喜欢的事情而被赞扬.和以前做着自己辛苦熬过得来的赞扬，完全不同.那份喜悦，无法形容. 在告别了一段时间的地方,重拾我的信心和自信.休息了一阵子，才发现其实自己已经能以更成熟的领导方式去带领别人和与别人沟通.还有还有，和我的小苹果们一起完成的1加零槟城流浪记,永生难忘.
七月,让人愉快的无业生活啊！不用为别人打工，成为帮别人填补所有烂处的“plaster＂．宣布我投入自己的事业的日子正式开始．充满着正面力量,努力耕耘着,认真,仔细的斟酌我每一个决定.自己没有发现其实我在改变,直到有个朋友说,他发现投入我自己的事业后的我变了,变得更稳定可靠了.也许吧！我有变坚强和成熟了哦．哈哈白痴自己讲的．
八月，日子过了太快了吧！我的天啊!朋友也开始陆陆续续的辞掉工作当米虫啦．我不孤单啦！但每次出门都要承受某程度的压力的我，还是呆在家吧．出门有时还蛮累的.虽然和朋友一起的时光很快乐．
或许，我只是选择性的与某个群的朋友出去而惹到某群不爽．我只是想说，我了解你尝试过把我拉进去，我也试过要融入．但我发现我并不是那么的快乐，和真心．因为我已经慢慢脱节．缝隙越来越大．当我发现，我不能填满缝隙的时侯，我知道我自己应该退后了．种种的因素让我觉得我真的找不到一片适合我的那块拼图．对不起．但我们还会是朋友，因为我真的相信朋友不需要每天每个星期都见面，偶尔见见才会显得我这个从来不会找话题来说的无聊人变的更有趣更好聊了，不是吗？由衷的感谢你的关心,就当你对我的关心太沉重,我暴殄天物. 我不想去为了谁而改变,我要找回正真的我.我的武装穿的太久,弄伤了自己才知道武装不是保护自己的. 喜欢我的,请继续喜欢吧！不喜欢的，也不要太别扭,因为我也未必会喜欢你.
十一月，刚考完试，憧憬&冲劲才刚刚萌芽。心里也对着未来的生活充满着无数的期待.一心的想要珍惜所有的一切.
十二月，甜蜜精彩的圣诞月. 看回之间在十二月写的一篇部落格才发现，十二月也发生很多让人伤心的事情. 但朋友和家人的陪伴，还算快乐的度过了
一月，新的一年，新的希望.大家开始工作，开始上课了.机器人的日子，才刚刚开始。也是打击了我，让我破茧而出的时候.我才慢慢的学习长大.
二月，有些平淡，但因为是农历新年的缘故，还过得挺不错的.回家乡和家人亲戚们一起度过,简单幸福.
三月，拿成绩单的日子.一年半的努力就只为了那几个数字吧. 成绩也不至于让我感到不快.还可以吧.满足就好，不强求了.毕竟考试不是一切。因为我不是学霸，所以我说得出这种话. 我愿意当个比较有才华的普通学生.哈哈哈 哪门子的自我安慰啊
四月，开始感受到工作上的不愉快，恨不得下一秒我就能潇洒不干. 有点榴莲特质的我，心里那软绵绵的我劝了自己，在忍一忍吧！
五月，开始了忙碌的社团活动，一年多没有接触的人和事，难免会生疏，虽然那些曾经是我多有信心和引以为傲的事情啊！有点小尴尬，毕竟同龄的伙伴们都已经找到了自己的定位.而我就得慢慢的摸索.庆幸选了自己所属的领域，重新开始。重新自定义.
六月,压力和体力超出负荷的月头.病了,偏偏在要去露营活动的时候.满伤心的,又再度的让别人否定了我的诚信.好不容易建立起的信心，又被击垮了.
好在，能赶在我唯一能做点事的夜晚前赶到现场去帮忙.应该还算负责任吧！我忘了自己那晚所跳的舞蹈好不好，有没有跳错，但我知道我的存在让我的同伴们多了份安全感，我知道在表演时他们还是会偷偷的瞄我的舞步．这样，足够了吧！ 尽管我知道以我的经验和能力,我保持太沉默了.哎哟，人家比较慢热. 在出席了“活动评估会议”（post mortem meeting) ，得到了一点点的赞扬，还有个dancing queen的封号.感觉不错,因为做着自己喜欢的事情而被赞扬.和以前做着自己辛苦熬过得来的赞扬，完全不同.那份喜悦，无法形容. 在告别了一段时间的地方,重拾我的信心和自信.休息了一阵子，才发现其实自己已经能以更成熟的领导方式去带领别人和与别人沟通.还有还有，和我的小苹果们一起完成的1加零槟城流浪记,永生难忘.
七月,让人愉快的无业生活啊！不用为别人打工，成为帮别人填补所有烂处的“plaster＂．宣布我投入自己的事业的日子正式开始．充满着正面力量,努力耕耘着,认真,仔细的斟酌我每一个决定.自己没有发现其实我在改变,直到有个朋友说,他发现投入我自己的事业后的我变了,变得更稳定可靠了.也许吧！我有变坚强和成熟了哦．哈哈白痴自己讲的．
八月，日子过了太快了吧！我的天啊!朋友也开始陆陆续续的辞掉工作当米虫啦．我不孤单啦！但每次出门都要承受某程度的压力的我，还是呆在家吧．出门有时还蛮累的.虽然和朋友一起的时光很快乐．
或许，我只是选择性的与某个群的朋友出去而惹到某群不爽．我只是想说，我了解你尝试过把我拉进去，我也试过要融入．但我发现我并不是那么的快乐，和真心．因为我已经慢慢脱节．缝隙越来越大．当我发现，我不能填满缝隙的时侯，我知道我自己应该退后了．种种的因素让我觉得我真的找不到一片适合我的那块拼图．对不起．但我们还会是朋友，因为我真的相信朋友不需要每天每个星期都见面，偶尔见见才会显得我这个从来不会找话题来说的无聊人变的更有趣更好聊了，不是吗？由衷的感谢你的关心,就当你对我的关心太沉重,我暴殄天物. 我不想去为了谁而改变,我要找回正真的我.我的武装穿的太久,弄伤了自己才知道武装不是保护自己的. 喜欢我的,请继续喜欢吧！不喜欢的，也不要太别扭,因为我也未必会喜欢你.
Sunday, July 12, 2015
Flash Back
Rewind back to June.
3 days 2 nights of Penang Trip with fellow buddies.
Eventhough many people asked me : Did you went here? Did you went there? Did you visit that place? Did you eat that ..eat this ..play that play this..Did you ..Did you ..?
I have only one answer to all their "did you" questions which is NOPE !
Haha we did not planned anything in advance,all our planned journey was well organised till we get on the bus in Penang and reached our hostel. That's all. But somehow I love it.
Too much planning will anyway end up being rushy and draggy and lazy and bla bla...too heavy to go on a "Super Well Planned Trip". The unplan plan is always turn out to be the best plan! (which I strongly agree,but the condition is you must doing the "unplan" with happening people just like "Them" **Lovely <3
Well,I am regret I have dragged this long to write about this trip. LMAO I have merely forgot what we actually did over there but the tiny tiny sweet moments I'll never forget.Ya,you know I tend to pick up small little thing,clingy? Because I am really feeling old and my memory span has really moving backward and making me feel like I am a goldfish.3 seconds memory?
And so I decided to make a video about our trip as clicking the photos one by one can be so boring.
First video was done one day after I got all the compilation of the photos. And I was planning to do the 2nd & 3rd videos.....but...... well. Let's not talk about it. I will get it done when the mood strikes me.
Instead of going through every details of the trip, I rather will express those words that my heart has "spoken" but my mouth has never spit it out ( monolog?)
On the very first day itself, was quite looking forward. Well touched down hostel with surprise. "Omg, I love this place! This hostel is totally my love",Look at the stairs,colourful! Look at the room,so clean, look at the toilet,so bright that I am not even worried there will be "someone" scratching my back while I am showering! haha just joking. My inner voice spoke.
And then the food hunter in me has awaken, well she slept back again after I got my first meal.Not so surprising anyway.Perhaps I am not those type who will actually "enjoy" the food then.
Okay walking through the streets aimlessly,unknowing where we were heading to. I always wanted to explore somewhere I am not used to be,but "not under this hot & scorching sun man!" My inner voice spoke again.
Camera museum, definately my love.As I am a "fake" photography lover,who never own a DSLR professional camera,but I am proud enough I am able to shoot photos kind of professionally with my suckish phone.hahaha
Chocolate,well not so favourite so let's skip that part. The only thing I remember was the chilli chocolate,the coffee we drank & the guy (tour guide in choco house) with FLAWLESS skin.
Okay the memories after has broken into pieces as I can't recall anything after that ( because now its 1.46am )
Night time, nicely shower and hit the other girl's room.
Yea, what we have done is private & confidential. Haha or should Parental advisory???
Under 18?? hahaha forget about it. Tons of selfie were taken!
Then fast forward......>>>>>>>>
Celebrated Soon Leng & Kae Shin's Birthday ! Boom !
After we went back to own bed and sleep.
My inner voice started when I was half asleep : What ! Super damn hot, but bloody hell I not dare to wake up to turn on the fan !! Just because of me afraid of that " corner" which I know there is nothing over there.But my butt and brain is not commanding my legs to stand up. Well continue to sleep with "hotness' ! hahah make sense, I am HOT! woohoo
Second day, took bus went up to somewhere which I will never get the name right. Some bukit thingy where the escape park was built. Okay, ESCAPE PARK! I'm ready ! (my inner voice spoken again).
Okay well, we did not hit the park anyway. Kind of....okay next time next time !
And then walking by the road side, we were stopped by a indian uncle who was promoting their water sports. OH YEAH ! We FOUND the Sea ! my inner voice shouted.
The seaside looks crazily quiet and unfamous i think.But who cares,that is SEA man !
The uncle was excitedly introduced their bot to an unknown island. Well, I was about to agree but wait I need to seek other opinions too. But it seems bot is not suitable for everyone . Okay forget about it. Then nego nego nego. Get to jump on the jet ski. Okay it took alot of my courage to decide and said " yes i want to play " as I used to phobia to sea ..and river...and swimming pool. Well I wish I am no longer phobia then. Okay my intention was not to control the jet ski but at least I ride on it.That's all. To control,honestly I got no guts.HAHA as I know I am a lousy driver for everything except driving people crazy .heehee
Dragging our tired body go back,Oh crap!
And then walk walk walk , Eh saw my Form 1 classmates who came from Johor in Penang!
Omg I have never meet them ever since 2009. LOL I am not even bump into them in my hometown,but I met them in Penang ! Faith ! Okay that's over. Look the buddies were all nicely waiting besides there. I should not talk any longer.hehe My innoer voice spoke with guilt.
Buy food go back hostel and worrying the food packing might collapse anytime soon. Okay I should not have comment anything about since they are not using polysterene packaging.That's fine.
First thing after hitting our dinner, jump into bathroom and shower.
WHAAAAATTTTTTT ! Is that my legs ?? Why is it look so brownish ? Yea no doubt, you might be thinking I might be "bumping" into the "someone else" right, hahah nope just my legs got sun burnt and it got 2 tones over my legs, till now its has been 3 weeks to 4 weeks soon the colour is not even yet. *Nevermind I bought my lovely whitening lotion. Jeng Jeng ! By knowing my legs got sun burnt, I am afraid to walk to the mirror and look at my face. Because I will be seeing a clown then. I knew it everytime I got sun burnt, my nose will be the first part to get burnt.Okay they are way too "outstanding" or maybe my spectacles is a good sun protector.
Okay to be continue. My liver gonna explode. sign out 2.12 am.You might find alot typo and error .Okay it was not being touched up yet.
3 days 2 nights of Penang Trip with fellow buddies.
Eventhough many people asked me : Did you went here? Did you went there? Did you visit that place? Did you eat that ..eat this ..play that play this..Did you ..Did you ..?
I have only one answer to all their "did you" questions which is NOPE !
Haha we did not planned anything in advance,all our planned journey was well organised till we get on the bus in Penang and reached our hostel. That's all. But somehow I love it.
Too much planning will anyway end up being rushy and draggy and lazy and bla bla...too heavy to go on a "Super Well Planned Trip". The unplan plan is always turn out to be the best plan! (which I strongly agree,but the condition is you must doing the "unplan" with happening people just like "Them" **Lovely <3
Well,I am regret I have dragged this long to write about this trip. LMAO I have merely forgot what we actually did over there but the tiny tiny sweet moments I'll never forget.Ya,you know I tend to pick up small little thing,clingy? Because I am really feeling old and my memory span has really moving backward and making me feel like I am a goldfish.3 seconds memory?
And so I decided to make a video about our trip as clicking the photos one by one can be so boring.
First video was done one day after I got all the compilation of the photos. And I was planning to do the 2nd & 3rd videos.....but...... well. Let's not talk about it. I will get it done when the mood strikes me.
Instead of going through every details of the trip, I rather will express those words that my heart has "spoken" but my mouth has never spit it out ( monolog?)
On the very first day itself, was quite looking forward. Well touched down hostel with surprise. "Omg, I love this place! This hostel is totally my love",Look at the stairs,colourful! Look at the room,so clean, look at the toilet,so bright that I am not even worried there will be "someone" scratching my back while I am showering! haha just joking. My inner voice spoke.
And then the food hunter in me has awaken, well she slept back again after I got my first meal.Not so surprising anyway.Perhaps I am not those type who will actually "enjoy" the food then.
Okay walking through the streets aimlessly,unknowing where we were heading to. I always wanted to explore somewhere I am not used to be,but "not under this hot & scorching sun man!" My inner voice spoke again.
Camera museum, definately my love.As I am a "fake" photography lover,who never own a DSLR professional camera,but I am proud enough I am able to shoot photos kind of professionally with my suckish phone.hahaha
Chocolate,well not so favourite so let's skip that part. The only thing I remember was the chilli chocolate,the coffee we drank & the guy (tour guide in choco house) with FLAWLESS skin.
Okay the memories after has broken into pieces as I can't recall anything after that ( because now its 1.46am )
Night time, nicely shower and hit the other girl's room.
Yea, what we have done is private & confidential. Haha or should Parental advisory???
Under 18?? hahaha forget about it. Tons of selfie were taken!
Then fast forward......>>>>>>>>
Celebrated Soon Leng & Kae Shin's Birthday ! Boom !
After we went back to own bed and sleep.
My inner voice started when I was half asleep : What ! Super damn hot, but bloody hell I not dare to wake up to turn on the fan !! Just because of me afraid of that " corner" which I know there is nothing over there.But my butt and brain is not commanding my legs to stand up. Well continue to sleep with "hotness' ! hahah make sense, I am HOT! woohoo
Second day, took bus went up to somewhere which I will never get the name right. Some bukit thingy where the escape park was built. Okay, ESCAPE PARK! I'm ready ! (my inner voice spoken again).
Okay well, we did not hit the park anyway. Kind of....okay next time next time !
And then walking by the road side, we were stopped by a indian uncle who was promoting their water sports. OH YEAH ! We FOUND the Sea ! my inner voice shouted.
The seaside looks crazily quiet and unfamous i think.But who cares,that is SEA man !
The uncle was excitedly introduced their bot to an unknown island. Well, I was about to agree but wait I need to seek other opinions too. But it seems bot is not suitable for everyone . Okay forget about it. Then nego nego nego. Get to jump on the jet ski. Okay it took alot of my courage to decide and said " yes i want to play " as I used to phobia to sea ..and river...and swimming pool. Well I wish I am no longer phobia then. Okay my intention was not to control the jet ski but at least I ride on it.That's all. To control,honestly I got no guts.HAHA as I know I am a lousy driver for everything except driving people crazy .heehee
Dragging our tired body go back,Oh crap!
And then walk walk walk , Eh saw my Form 1 classmates who came from Johor in Penang!
Omg I have never meet them ever since 2009. LOL I am not even bump into them in my hometown,but I met them in Penang ! Faith ! Okay that's over. Look the buddies were all nicely waiting besides there. I should not talk any longer.hehe My innoer voice spoke with guilt.
Buy food go back hostel and worrying the food packing might collapse anytime soon. Okay I should not have comment anything about since they are not using polysterene packaging.That's fine.
First thing after hitting our dinner, jump into bathroom and shower.
WHAAAAATTTTTTT ! Is that my legs ?? Why is it look so brownish ? Yea no doubt, you might be thinking I might be "bumping" into the "someone else" right, hahah nope just my legs got sun burnt and it got 2 tones over my legs, till now its has been 3 weeks to 4 weeks soon the colour is not even yet. *Nevermind I bought my lovely whitening lotion. Jeng Jeng ! By knowing my legs got sun burnt, I am afraid to walk to the mirror and look at my face. Because I will be seeing a clown then. I knew it everytime I got sun burnt, my nose will be the first part to get burnt.Okay they are way too "outstanding" or maybe my spectacles is a good sun protector.
Okay to be continue. My liver gonna explode. sign out 2.12 am.You might find alot typo and error .Okay it was not being touched up yet.
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